How to Make Intentional Connections for Meaningful Relationships

Have you ever been having a conversation with someone and arrived at an awkward pause that lasts an eternity? Most people desperately snatch a random topic out of the air to fill that hollow space in the conversation. We’ve all done it. Some people may go a step further and think, ‘how can I meet people more aligned with me?’ Based on how typical these situations can be, it helps to shed some light on how to make intentional connections with others.

Relationships can be challenging. Even more so, when they have a foundation of convenience versus deeper relatability. It is possible to set up your relationships for solid connection from the very beginning, though. One of the best ways to do so is to be deliberate with your interactions with people. 

THE PROXIMITY PRINCIPLE

It’s essential to be intentional with our interactions because of what is known as the proximity principle. According to the proximity principle, people are most likely to establish relationships with those that are physically closer to them compared to those farther away. Basically, we tend to prefer people (and things) when they have constant exposure to them. This is how work associates or classmates can easily become friends.

Regardless of who you’re looking for: friend, lover, or business associate – who you build a bond with can significantly depend on how you meet them. Knowing this and how the proximity principle works allow us to capitalize on our influence over the circumstances of meeting people. Here are some ideas on how to make intentional connections that can cultivate more meaningful relationships over time.

 

Ideas on How to Make Intentional Connections

Interest Focused

Creating the potential for highly-connected relationships can simply begin with your interests and hobbies. Ask yourself some questions to get ideas flowing.

• What does “me-time” look like for you?
• What is an activity you’ve always wanted to try or learn?
• How would you spend your day if adulting wasn’t a priority?

 

Now, find places people are engaging in your favorite activities. Bike enthusiasts, for example, may ask about local biking events when they go to their local sporting goods store for a tune-up or purchase. Shared interests and hobbies can speak to compatibility, which is a common foundation within a relationship. 

 

Goal Focused

Another way to connect is to focus on goals that are important to you. Surrounding yourself with people committed to similar goals can be a source of ideas, support, and accountability. It speaks to a similar passion for a certain quality of life. Fitness groups, business conventions, and wealth savings clubs are a few examples of goal-oriented crowds to mingle in. 

Just make sure the interactions are centered more around your long-term (end) goals rather than short-term (means) goals. This way, your connections are more likely to be based on values instead of temporary or superficial circumstance. Speaking of values…

 

Value Focused

Relating to people based on values is among the most meaningful ways to build strong relationships because our values are usually a constant in our lives. They don’t change very frequently or drastically. As long as you’re operating within your values, the potential for value-based interactions to thrive can be very high. 

Health, wellness, religion, and spirituality are some things that may come to mind when thinking of places to meet people. For religious people, places of worship are an easy starting point, but people also connect through things like training courses or workshops. How? I had an acquaintance who attended a workshop on effective communication skills and made a dating connection. So anything is possible.

 

Things to Remember

Just a few things to remember when you’re out and about, ready for your new bestie or soulmate. 

Be approachable. 

Make sure you have an inviting and open demeanor. Engage in conversation with others. Consider some conversation-starters like questions or relevant hot topics to have with you. You’d be surprised how far a welcoming demeanor can go, so smile at the very least.

Avoid taking sand to the beach. 

If you have a close friend that already shares certain interests with you, resist the urge to take them to social spaces where you want to meet new people. It will allow you to get out of your comfort zone and interact with others rather than unconsciously clinging to your familiar friend. I know what you’re thinking, ‘almost no one goes out alone.’ If you must take someone, a good alternative is a less familiar person, like a classmate or someone you like from work.

Make an effort. 

Sometimes meeting someone who understands you can fall into your lap, like the random Uber driver or the person you bumped carts with at the grocery store. Most times, though, it takes a little effort. It may be worth it to trade a weekend in to go out and vibe with others. Go to that garden-to-table cooking workshop at the local farmer’s market. 

Think outside the box. 

The internet and social media are convenient resources to search, but there are other ways to find like-minded people. As I mentioned earlier, think about where you shop, for example. Local stores often partner with community organizers and other businesses to host events that may interest you. They may have a community bulletin promoting events within your area. You can even ask the store associate you often see to find out about local happenings. Check out neighborhood newsletters, church bulletins, and business publications. 

 

We’ve all formed relationships of convenience based on the people we happen to be around the most. We also know that some of these relationships can feel forced and surface-level. However, with some deliberate effort and creative thinking, better relationships can be just a conscious connection away.